4 tips for staying sane post pcs

I think there's a common misconception that once your move is complete and you've reached your destination that the hard work is done. Honestly, having done more than one PCS before - and now doing one with children - I can say that that's definitely not the case. The move is so much more than just a physical move. It's an emotional displacement, and it's one that I think we've all felt to some degree. I think that, for Ryan at least, this is a homecoming of sorts. For me though, it's a big adjustment, and Spencer's definitely showed signs of struggling, as well.

We actually pulled them from the daycare they started this week for a few reasons. First, it was much farther than we'd anticipated. Second, he was acting out, not sleeping well, and he seemed really bothered by it. We got the boys into a great new place (the one we'd originally hoped for), and they start Monday, so we're excited about that. There's definitely a lot of adjustment going on though, so we're doing our best to stay balanced. For us, it's a balance of work and play. Here are four ways we're working to stay sane post-PCS.

1 // Get out.

It's as easy as that. It doesn't have to be an elaborate excursion. Get away from the boxes and clutter. Breathe. We went for a long family walk on the trail behind our home with Danny, and it was the best. Or, for example, today we did a family trip to Trader Joe's and HomeGoods. Nothing fancy. No frills. Just a breath of something other than unfamiliar walls.

2 // Give yourself some space.

This is a big one - and a hard one for so many military spouses. We pick our homes, then we race to reestablish them in our new duty station. It's not always that simple though. There are quirks. For example, our house had a lot of damage when we moved in that we were unaware of. We're missing doorframes and have huge stains on the carpets. I was furious and upset with myself for renting sight unseen, but then I sat back, took a breath, and remembered it's a 12-month lease. We have incredible neighbors, and we have no timeline set that's holding us to having everything set in a set amount of time. Give yourself some space to breathe, move, and feel.

3 // Find the good.

A PCS is always a mixed bag of emotions. There's excitement about the prospect of something new, but there's fear of the unknown, too. For us, as much as we were ready to leave Fort Drum, leaving our home was an entirely different story. Our neighbors were family, and our home was our home. We brought two babies there. We adopted a dog. We made so many memories, and it's easy to get hung up on those changes. However, we're making new memories, too, and it's so important to focus on that. Find the good in your new duty station. Where are the positives? We've found so many new places to eat, share company, and meet new people. For example, we went to FOB Brewery for Father's Day, and it was such a great experience for Ryan - and it was family-friendly!

4 // Find your tribe.

I can't express this one enough. I'm a loner by nature. I'm comfortable with silence and being alone. However, in military life and, I'd hazard a guess, life in general, you need your people. You need your tribe. When Ryan deployed, I relied on friends and neighbors like never before. Those people, your tribe, will pick you up when you think you can't go on. Those people make all difference. We've met most of our neighbors now, and they're absolutely wonderful. We're so blessed. We also have a family who was in Ryan's prior unit at Fort Drum stationed here, as well, so that's been a comfort. It's the little things. Trust me. My goal is to find a running or workout group here in the next few weeks. Till then, Danny will be my workout gal :)

I still have mixed feelings about Fort Lewis as a whole. It's so big, and that's scary. But I'm excited, too. I love a good adventure, and this is definitely the best kind.

What sort of moving tips or PCS tips do you have that have helped you?

farewell, black river

I’ve  been dreading writing this post because, despite the fact that Fort Drum isn't our favorite, we've made this place our own for the past three and a half years. This is the reality of military life. We move, we settle, we put down roots, we pull up those roots, we move again. Rinse and repeat. It's normal, but normal isn't always the easiest to stomach, especially when you have to move a whole family.

We moved to our tiny village of Black River in the final days of 2014. We closed on our little home on December 31st, and we moved into a home devoid of furniture with two cats and a three-week-old baby the eve of a giant snowfall. When we woke on the first day of 2015, there were 22 inches of snow on the ground - something that these new parents fresh from Arizona were totally unprepared for.

And yet, we did it. We made a home here. We watched our little Spencer turn one, then two, then three. We welcomed our second son in 2016, and we brought him to our little Black River home. We brought a dog into the mix, and our family grew again.

We created a life here. We made friends who became family, and we weathered a deployment together. Each of this life's crazy moments was tempered by the roots we set down here. And those roots are deeper than I'd imagined they'd be. We found our tribe of people; surrogate aunts, sisters, mommas, grandparents. My boys made friends and found teachers who love them and nourish their little spirits.

I can't count the number of times we walked and ran these streets both individually and as a family. We've shoveled the driveway more times than we'd love to say. Most importantly, we grew here. Together. Individually. As a family. This has been our constant for three and a half years.

Black River village will always have a little piece of my heart.

New York might not be for us, but this little village is one of incredible people, selflessness, and beauty, and I'll miss it far more than I expected I would. Tomorrow, we hit the road, and we start afresh on our journey to our new post. This is the nature of Army life, and I get it - and sometimes I even love it.

But today...today, I just want to love on this little village a little longer.

making moves & saying goodbyes

Well, that's a wrap on our final weekend here in Black River, folks. Honestly, it was a whirlwind. It was fun, tiring, not without its share of little disappointments, but overall a good one. I mentioned on Friday that we were having family photos done, and it didn't happen based on the weather and, sadly, we're not able to reschedule because we move on Thursday morning - crazy, right? It turned out to be a blessing in disguise though because Spencer's asthma kicked in this weekend pretty badly, and we spent the better half of Sunday at urgent care having prednisone and xopanex treatments because his O2 levels were hovering in the upper 80s again. No bueno.

Overall though, we made goals, we got them done, and we did what we needed to do. We're stressed, but we're doing it. Our boys are resilient little champions as they watch their things get boxed up piece by piece. We're doing our best to make it "just another day" in the Moore household, and we're making it as fun as possible. That's an interesting concept though, amiright?

We still managed to get out and have some fun though. The boys and I went to Thompson Park Zoo one last time with Spencer's old teacher, Vanessa, and her son, Jayden. They had the time of their lives playing, looking at the animals, and spending time with good friends. Ryan had to conquer some stuff around the house while we did that, but we spent some quality time later in the day.

Now's the real final countdown - though I'm sure you're sick of me saying that by now! We have three days left, guys. Ryan picks up the moving truck tomorrow. Our packers are coming on Wednesday, and my mom flies in on Wednesday evening. We leave bright and early Thursday morning to start our cross-country journey. I think I've been in denial until now. I'm not ready to say goodbye to so many people that have become fixtures in our lives. And yet, there's an excitement, too. Let's just call us a mixed bag of emotions.

In other news, does anyone have any tips on what we should stop and see along the way? We're definitely making time to see Mount Rushmore and the Crazy Horse Memorial. We might make a stop to see Old Faithful. Mostly though, we're taking our time. I've taken a week off work to spend with family as we embark on this trek, so I'm excited to savor the time as a family.

I'll do my best to post as we head out West, but we're cutting off our internet here on Wednesday, so it'll be hit or miss. Be sure to follow along on my instagram, and I'll share each step of the way!

I'm linking up today with B Loved Boston for Weekending.

one final friday in black river

We're officially under a week until moving day. Are you tired of our countdowns yet? I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm really not. I've said at least a dozen times - military families live by countdowns. But seriously, we leave next Thursday, bright and early. Reality is hitting hard that we're down to the wire now. We've packed a few boxes since we're doing a mostly full DITY, but we are having packers come through next Wednesday since I'm not supposed to lift more than 20 lbs, and I may or may not have told Ryan that packing was a straight-up no-go for me.

Beyond that, we officially have tenants for our home here at Fort Drum. We had a couple of applications prior. One fell through, one couple was so sweet, but a little underqualified. This third couple is dual military, and they couldn't have been more qualified if they tried. We'll have to eat one month's rent, as she won't be arriving until the end of June, but we're so excited to have such great people in our little home.

Boys' Part Dino Jammies c/o Carters (available here)

I'm waxing all sorts of nostalgic lately. It's no secret that Fort Drum isn't our favorite duty station, but these last few weeks have made it clear how much of a home Fort Drum and Black River has become to us. It's hard putting down roots only to pull them up again, but I also know that this is both a blessing and a curse of military life. I love change; change with little ones is just a little bit harder.  They'll be starting a new school mid-June, get a new bedroom, a new home, a new yard, and a whole new neck of the woods. They're resilient little boys though, so I can't wait to see how they do.

This weekend, we have work to do around the house, but we're going to savor our home just a little longer, too. We're going to enjoy this little house. We're going to play in the backyard, go to the zoo one last time, enjoy the weather and wrap up our time here in style. We also have one last set of family pictures with our favorite photographer here tonight, and I can't wait to share.

Next week, we're embarking on an epic adventure across the country. We're planning to AirBnB, rather than stay in hotels each night, and I can't wait to share how that goes. Ryan will be driving the moving truck and towing the Civic - and Danny will ride with him. I'll be driving the Highlander with my mom, the boys, and the cats. We expect the trip will take about 5 full days, but we're going to play it safely above all else.

Cheers to adventure, friends, and cheers to a wonderful weekend ahead!

I'm linking up today with Momfessionals and Smidge of This.

memorial day weekend 2018

Ryan is home! He got back super late Saturday night, and we got to spend two of our three-day-weekend days with our favorite soldier, which was such a treat. The boys were so thrilled to have Daddy back - albeit a little confused. When we got them up on Sunday morning, Spencer greeted me and then said, "Oh! Hi Daddy!" After that, it was all cuddles and love for Daddy all weekend, which makes my mama heart so happy. 

We had a busy outdoorsy weekend here in Black River. The weather has been hot - so hot, in fact, that we hooked up the AC units. Fun fact...most of the old homes here still don't have central AC. It just doesn't make sense because summer doesn't last that long. Since our home was built in 1880, we obviously don't have AC, and we purchased portable units that do the trick during the few super-hot days. I digress though. We got to spend time in the sun, playing in the baby pool, doing some household maintenance, barbecuing, and just enjoying one of our final weekends here.

Yesterday, we decided to start a new family Memorial Day tradition. We bought loose flowers, and we went to our local Black River Cemetery. We sought out the graves of our fallen soldiers. Some were from World War I, some World War II, and some were much too recent. We took the time to put flowers on as many of these graves as possible. It's so important to us that we teach our little boys the true cost of freedom, and we show them how important it is to strive to be worthy of their sacrifice.

They were somewhat clueless, but they did listen, and they did their best to participate. Plus, it was our first time actually visiting this cemetery. There are so many old graves there for soldiers long-gone. It was beautiful and humbling, and I'm so glad we took the time to do it.

^^^ don't mind the fallen tree - we lost it in a windstorm, and it's being removed this week :(

After that, we stumbled upon our local Black River Memorial Day Parade. Can you believe we've lived here three and a half years and never saw the parade? Regardless, as we were driving home, we ran into it, so we decided to stop and watch. Ryan and I had to laugh because we totally forgot they throw candy at parades. The boys were already in awe of the fire trucks when lollipops came flying in their direction. Basically, it was heaven for them.

We pulled out the hammock later that afternoon, and while the boys played with the baby pool and water table, we soaked up these last lazy days at Fort Drum. We move next week, so we're down to the wire. I'll miss it, but I'm so ready to get this show on the road (literally).

I hope you all had wonderful weekends! Cheers to a short week :)

5 things I'll miss about fort drum

For those who read my last post, thank you so much for your sweet words and optimism. You have no idea how much I appreciated your positivity in this tumultuous PCS season. As we wrap up our time here, I want to reflect a little on the great things about Fort Drum because, I promise you, there are some great things. In 13 days (yes, you read that right), we'll be on the roadtrip of a lifetime out West. Before we do that though, we're enjoying all the things we love most about life here in Black River  - and things that future Fort Drum residents might just love, too!

1 // The summer months.

This sounds so vague, and maybe it is a little vague, but there is nothing better than summer here at Fort Drum. There's something so amazing about a hard-fought spring and summer since winter lasts so long, and these days of clear blue skies and green grass will be missed by the Moores. While Ryan was deployed, the boys and I ventured far and wide to really soak up the season. We visited the beaches of Lake Ontario, we picked berries, we played at Boldt Castle, and more. Summer is fantastic here, and the options are endless.

2 // Moore's Blizzard Barn.

No, we don't own it, but yes, Moore's Blizzard Barn is right in our little Village of Black River! This local ice cream joint is right on the border of Le Ray Street and 342 - right by the Belvedere Gate of Fort Drum Main. My boys have grown up going there, and there's something about a local mom'n'pop ice cream shot that just screams down-home-charm. We're destined for at least two more indulgent evenings there before we leave.

3 // Southwick Beach State Park.

Despite what you may think, northern NY does actually have beaches. However, they border the larger lakes up here, which makes them a special treat. They're not saltwater! The boys loved the soft, sandy shores, playing at the local playground by the beach, and taking a dip in the surprisingly choppy - and warm - water. We spent many a day there playing ourselves silly and then hitting the hay early. Pro-tip - it costs $1 to get into the park. Too easy.

4 // Tug Hill Vineyards.

This beautiful family-owned joint is nestled in Lowville, and it's home to incredible berry-picking in the summer months (strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries), and the most incredible brunch you'll ever eat. I included Tug Hill Vineyards in my roundup of places to eat around Fort Drum, but let it be known that there's more than brunch here! The boys eat their weight in berries each summer, and they have wine tastings fairly regularly. Their local wines are delicious, and if you're in the mood for a strawberry rhubarb wine, you're in luck! Here's hoping we get out there one last time before we leave!

5 // Kingston, ON.

I know what you're thinking. How can I miss Canada about New York? So, here's the thing. Canada is literally a hop, skip, and a jump from Fort Drum. Rather than going to Syracuse for excitement, we love to head up to Kingston, Ontario. The people are friendly, the weather is (usually) great, and the food options are divine. Plus, if you've got your passport, why not explore the area around you? We'll be close to Vancouver on the opposite side of the country, but Kingston holds a special place in our hearts.

As the clock keeps ticking and as our time here nears to a close, I find myself becoming more and more sentimental about it all. It's the end of an era. I mean, it always is, but this is really the close of a chapter. We're soaking up the good here before we go though, and we're making the best of it.

I'm linking up today with Momfessionals and Smidge of This.

20 days and counting

We officially have less than three weeks until we move to Washington, and you want to know how much I've packed and prepped? Nada. Nothing. Zilch. I mean, I did some clean out for the village-wide cleanup two weeks ago, but beyond that, I've just been in denial. I think every single MILSPO out there can attest to the fact that it's often a hurry-up-and-wait scenario, and right now I'm just in denial. Here's the thing - summer is the most beautiful time of year here at Fort Drum. The trees are finally green, the birds are chirping, the skies are the most incredible Canadian blue...we survived winter, and now we have to pack it all away and move.

Don't get me wrong - I'm excited to move. I actually like moving and seeing new places. I do not, however, enjoy the process of moving. We made a home here, and now we have to start all over again.

So, as I revel in my lovely state of denial, my mom is coming up this weekend to see Black River one last time prior to our move. We're planning to head to Kingston again (assuming they let me cross the border with the boys without Ryan) and, hopefully, pack a few things away. We'll see how much packing actually gets done, but I know my boys are thrilled that Oma is going to come stay a couple days again. And no, they have no idea right now...we're surprising them!

I know I totally vaguebooked you guys the other day with my post about my passion project, and I apologize for all the cryptic talk! The truth is, I'm writing a book, and I'm excited - and nervous - to begin this project. I've started getting the pieces in motion, and I'm really looking forward to jumping in with both feet. So, fingers crossed this starts moving in the right direction. Also, re: blog changes. I'm transitioning my blog to Wordpress in the next couple weeks. I've thought about it for a while now, and as I transition this to more of my happy, positive, writing space, I'm looking forward to the functionality of it, as a whole.

So, revel in this little bitty baby blog while you can, folks, because changes are coming, and I couldn't be more ready for them!

spring has sprung

boys sweatshirts: old navy (available here) 

I hope everyone had the best Mother's Day weekends! Despite initially being sad about Ryan not being here for Mother's Day (again), we had a fantastic weekend here. The weather was perfect, my boys were sweet, and we were busy, busy, busy. And you guys know how I feel about staying busy during a TDY or deployment! On Saturday, we went to Old McDonald's Farm out in Sackets Harbor with one of Spencer's old teachers. She recently changed career paths, and Spencer has really missed her, so seeing her was truly a treat. She brought her little boy, and we had the time of our lives just seeing all the animals and reconnecting.

The boys have been going here for over a year now. When we started going last year, Porter wasn't even walking yet, so there are definitely some feelings, if you will, about this being one of our last trips before we move. That being said, we soaked it up, and we took our sweet time - even doing a hayride this time! Porter was in love with the bunnies, Spencer took his first pony ride, and we overfed the goats, as usual. Does it get better?

On Sunday, we really had no plans. I knew I needed some cleaning supplies for our impending move though, so we did a trip to Target, the boys got cake pops (their absolute favorite), and we bought a new plastic pool for the backyard. What better way to spend a sunny spring afternoon? The boys loved every second of it, and I enjoyed watching my boys soak up the sun and all the happiness that being outdoors brings.

When we moved here back in 2014, we picked this house, in large part, because of the huge backyard. We didn't realize that the boys wouldn't really be old enough to enjoy it until right before we moved again. Hindsight is 20/20, right? But seriously, they're loving it these days. They throw sticks for Danny, they run laps, and we enjoy the serenity and privacy that it brings. You really can't beat it.

While it wasn't a real, dedicated Mother's Day, I wouldn't have had it any other way. Truly. I spent it with my boys, we had a fun, relaxing time, and we stayed busy - all things that mean a lot to me while Ryan is gone. We need to get down to business for our big move to Washington in the next few days, so our time to play is dwindling, and the craziness is about to hit full-force. Until it does though, you'll find me in the backyard, playing with my boys.

I'm linking up today with B Loved Boston for Weekending.

we'll be seeing you

Goodbyes are the worst - even if you know they're not for that long.

Ryan left today for six weeks of training at another stateside Army post, and I'll be totally, truthfully honest. It sucks. I know this is the reality of Army life, and I get it. I can live with that...but explaining to our little boys why Daddy is gone again is the worst. They don't understand. I chose this, but they didn't, and that's hard.

Six weeks is easy though, all things considered. It's nothing compared to the nine months we did while Ryan was in Kuwait and Iraq last year. We're going to stay busy, and we're going to live by the endless countdowns that military families know all too well.

• Tomorrow, the boys and I are leaving for New Hampshire for a few days.
• On Monday, I'm heading somewhere solo, and though I'm not going to share why just yet, please keep your fingers crossed and send allllll the positive vibes
• On the 22nd, the boys and I are flying to South Carolina for a week in the sun with Oma & Opa
  
  

Our time here at Fort Drum is truly limited now. We're under two months from leaving our home here in Black River to make a new one out at Fort Lewis in Washington. Once the boys and I return from South Carolina, there's less than a month until Ryan comes home to use, so we're going to soak up this time, get things done, and count the days till Daddy's return.

It never gets easier, but we do grow to accept it and appreciate our time together more than ever before. We'll see you soon, honey.

we're counting down

I'm sure I've mentioned it (at least) three or four times here before, but military families pretty much always live by countdowns. Whether it's a countdown to a deployment, TDY, homecoming, PCS, or beyond, there's always something. Right now, we have two countdowns going on. First and foremost, Ryan is leaving TDY this week for 6 weeks, which I'm dreading. Obviously, I dread the separation, but I dread explaining it to the boys even more. They're so young, and they just don't understand. We're also counting down to our PCS to Washington, and we're officially under two months until that...which is insane.

Add in a few extra wrenches this week like potential job interviews (!!! - I'll let you know more when things are definite), clearing CIF for Ryan on post, locking in work stuff, and more, it's madness in the Moore household. So, we did our best to have another low-key weekend. On Saturday, we went to the Sensory Nook in Watertown with some friends. We haven't been in about a year, and the boys loved it as much as last time. Since winter refuses to release its icy grip - pun intended - an indoor excursion was a must.

We did lunch at Red Robin and delightfully overindulged, enjoying time with new friends and their sweet kiddos. On Sunday, we attempted to go to church. Truthfully, we succeeded, but my knee was in a ton of pain, and the boys just weren't having it, so we decided to forgo the full occasion and left at the end of sacrament. I think the boys are picking up on our moods and our stress, which is hard, and they decided to boycott naptime, only falling asleep about 30 minutes before we woke them up.

It was a hard latter half of the day, but we're doing our best to soak it up, hardships and all, because we're going to be apart again all too soon. Military life is hard, folks. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. I'm nervous being left alone with the boys while still on crutches, but I know that we can do this. Heck, we managed a 9-month deployment, so this should be a cakewalk, right?

Cross your fingers for us this week though, and please keep us in your thoughts. Big things are happening, and things are moving full-speed ahead. And, if you think of it, please send some good job interview vibes my way, pretty please! I'm crossing my fingers that something big happens preeeettty darn soon!

I'm linking up today with B Loved Boston for Weekending.

easter weekend 2018

You know those weekends where the best-made plans fall through? This was one of those weekends - and yet, it was also one of the best weekends we've had in a long while. Spencer brought home some sickness last week, and it's been making its way through the household. Porter started his fever Friday, and I felt absolutely awful Saturday. Poor Ryan was hit pretty hard yesterday. Even though we'd planned to go to Syracuse and weren't able, we still had so much fun, and that's kind of what made this weekend so special.

On Saturday, none of us were feeling particularly great, but the weather was beautifully springy, so Spencer and I got outside to decorate some eggs and play with Lindsey across the street for a while. It still hits me sometimes that he's not a toddler anymore. He's a real little boy. He's articulate, thoughtful, smart, and engaged, and he's always on the go. Together, we tackled dyeing Easter eggs (which failed miserably) but were so fun in the process. Pro-tip: if you see someone mention that Cool-Whip will work in place of shaving cream for this Pinterest task, don't listen to them. It doesn't. Oh well, it was fun :)

Sunday was Easter, and Mother Nature and New York decided it would be below freezing all day. We Were all still feeling awful, too, so we decided to forgo the traditional Easter egg hunt in favor of just laying low and enjoying each other's company. Besides their new tradition of going outside to put the flag out each morning, we stayed indoors...together. The boys absolutely loved their Easter baskets this year, and I just wanted to take a moment to talk about them because I'm pretty proud.

We try not to give the boys too much candy. They love it, and what kid doesn't, but we also believe in moderation. So, I wanted their Easter baskets to be more engaging if you will. We put sidewalk chalk, a coloring book, a little Paw Patrol car, a couple of treats, stickers, and more in their baskets. And you know what? They loved it! Spencer is obsessed with is his new toy, which cost less than $3, their coloring books were a huge hit, and they loved the stickers, too. There's something about a more modest Easter basket that just speaks to me. In a world of excess, it's simple, sweet, and fun.

After we opened our baskets, we knew we weren't really going anywhere because all of us felt awful. So, instead of lounging on the couch doing nothing, the boys and I decided to build a fort. We pulled all the dining chairs to the living room, brought all available throw blankets out, and we got to work. It was one of the simplest, funniest, most entertaining things we've done in a while. I mentioned last week that we're working towards minimizing TV usage here, and this is another great indoor activity you can use! The boys didn't want to watch TV once. They were too busy playing and exploring. Letting them be little and enjoying the little things is so, so sweet.

We have two months left in New York, and maybe I'm just waxing nostalgic because of that, but this time here - as hard as it's been - has also been beautiful and fun. We've made memories. We've lived a lot, and we've grown together. This past Easter was beautiful in its simplicity, and I'm so thankful for little moments like these that remind us of what really matters.

I hope you all had a beautiful Easter weekend and are as ready for spring as I am!

I'm linking up today with B Loved Boston for Weekending.